“I am sad”. “I am happy”. “I am excited”.
But the fact is, I am not sad. I am me, and sad is just passing through.
I don’t think it’s possible to “control” my emotions, in particular because when I try to exert control over something I am giving it my full attention, which tends to make it bigger and stronger.
It’s hard to conquer anything if the strength and grit it’s using to overpower me is the one that I keep giving it.
What helps is to not identify with my emotions. To learn to make a distinction between what I feel and me.
As I separate who I am from what I feel, I start to become a witness to my feelings, instead of getting all tangled up in them. I recognize them as something powerful but transitory.
This makes it more plausible for feelings to move through me.
Hello, anger. You rock me to my core, but long after you sweep through me I will still be here.
I am going to outlast you, because you are not who I am.