I know exactly how this feels. You need to ask yourself if you still love your spouse and want to change this dynamic. I think divorce would be better so you can find someone, who is a better fit for you. If you do want to stay, the first thing is to talk to your spouse and try tell them how you feel. Since it sounds like the relationship has not been good for a long time, therapy might help too. I read somewhere that someone tried to woo their spouse again like they were dating. I’m not sure if it would work but I feel it would not hurt either. The person didn’t expect anything from their spouse but found out that their spouse responded over time to their positive actions. He did this for 30 days.
My relationship with my spouse is done because we have grown too different and don’t want the same things anymore. He was uncomfortable with the difficult conversations I wanted to have and he didn’t want to go to therapy. I’m only staying for my son who will soon graduate from high school. For me personally, I know I need to leave to be happy.
Additionally, when I was having this problem about feeling so alone, I realized I don’t NEED a man to fulfill me. I can damn well stand on my own damn feet. Yes, it’s wonderful to have a guy to give me this BUT I don’t NEED it. I worked on myself to be okay with being with myself and loving myself. I am my own best friend. I don’t need constant affirmation from others but it is nice to hear. It was so freeing. I realize I don’t need my husband but he needs me. I have the power now. I have an ap too but I realized that I’ll never relinquish that control to anyone.
